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When Your Husband is Addicted to Pornography - Paperback

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Product Description

When your husband's addiction to pornography leaves you shattered, betrayed, and alone, where do you turn? Who do you turn to? Vicki Tiede, writing from personal experience, gently guides women toward God and away from despair. Through daily readings and questions on six important topics: hope, surrender, trust, identity, brokenness, and forgiveness, you will grow in healing and hope. Allowing God to meet your greatest needs is a long and learned process, but he promises to help you every step of the way. Questions and daily readings are suitable for both individuals and small groups.

About the Author

Vicki Tiede, MEd, MMin, is a Bible teacher; conference speaker; author of Plug Me In and Let Me Charge Overnight (2009); and a contributing author for five other books. Her passion is to share God's grace and faithfulness with women through the Scriptures. Living in Rochester, Minnesota, Vicki is also a wife, homeschooling mom, and women's ministries coordinator at her local church.

About the Product

Paperback: 288 pages
Publisher: New Growth Press (October 1, 2012)
Language: English
ISBN: 978-1936768639
Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 6 x 0.9 inches
Shipping Weight: 1 pound

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1. David on 5/13/2013, said:

I was so saddened and angered by this book that I threw it away when I snapped it up in 2012 eager for knowledge and help for me and for my wife. Yes, there is a great deal of spiritual help for the wife of a porn addict. But the author chose to leave her husband -- wow, some victory for Christ -- and her description of his condition and how she interacted with him about it left me with the firm belief that she did not truly exercise understanding, patience and compassion for this sick, sick man. I saw no evidence of a serious willingness to live separately until the addiction could be cured. He is sick for reasons that have nothing to do with the spouse. Help him get to the underlying reason. Don't shoot the injured and proclaim that it was unfortunate but necessary, and God is gonna get you happy now because that's the most important thing (I have yet to find that scripture). I see this book -- while entirely justifiably compassionate to the aggrieved wife -- as fundamentally failing to give wives the encouragement and tools they need to minister to their sick husbands. Yes, the situation is painful and tragic. But there is hope, there is recovery, and the wife has a critical role to play in the restoration of her family. I recommend instead Debra Laaser's book on this subject, which is much more psychologically and spiritually mature. She did not leave her husband, Mark, whose sexual addiction seems to have been as extensive as that of the author's husband. Mark Laaser, Ph.D., is now the author of the leading Christian book on recovery from porn addiction (which, for some reason, doesn't seem to be in the FL bookstore), and the Laasers together offer monthly intensive workshops for men, for women, and for couples. I can attest to the fact that they work. I know these opinions seem harsh, in the context of a woman who has been hurt so very deeply by the consequences of her husband's behavior, but our desire to minister to her and be forgiving can't cloud the fact that an even better result for her and for her family (as well as a witness for Christ) would have been to stay until the healing happens, and to work much harder at understanding and helping her husband than this book indicates she did. Maybe it was just too much to ask. But if that's the case, then we shouldn't celebrate the failure to be able to do the right thing by holding up her experience as a wonderful, Godly example.
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2. Chris on 5/13/2013, said:

I concur with David, and its a slippery slope represented anyway. Porn is not adultery despite the over interpretation of the scripture about lust of the heart and the "porneo" translation etc. If it is, then ANYTHING is. But, we cant say that because then we are charged with defending porn. The perfect false dichotomy is set up and it affords no escape for a man...he is at the whim of the wife's feelings, right where she wants him, right where the church and ministries like Family Life wants him, because look, just below they are selling "Stepping Up", yet another ever popular fix-men-fix-marriage product in a long line of same. This book, and those programs have created the perfect rational for frivolous divorce. They generate huge marriage drama which sells books and counseling, then they divorce and that sells even more. No, the motive here is not profit, that's just a side effect. The motive is Christian male leaders seeking female approval above all else. The curse of Eve is alive and well
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